Posted in John Hawkins, satire

One Hundred Ways To Spot A Communist Liberal … Part 9

Aviary Photo_1310720430063096361) They don’t believe Progressive is an insurance company owned and run by communists.

2) They don’t believe the Nazi LGBT are persecuting Christians.

3) They don’t believe in Santa Claus.

4) They don’t believe Jesus is white.

5) They don’t believe Obama is sending flowers and candy , and greeting cards to his Muslim terrorist buddies.

6) They don’t believe the Clinton’s are guilty of murdering their opponents.

7) They don’t believe Hillary is really a gay , communist Muslim , who helped Barack Obama get his Muslim terrorist buddies jobs in the White House.

8) They don’t believe Bill Clinton is also a gay , communist Muslim.

9) They don’t believe the universe is  a hologram controlled by Barack Obama.

10) They don’t believe the moon is really a hollow alien spaceship.

If you know anyone who adheres to any of the above , they are indeed communist liberals in need of mental therapy.

Posted in John Hawkins, satire

One Hundred Ways To Spot A Communist Liberal – Part 8

Aviary Photo_1310842801347203611) They don’t believe Santa Claus is white.

2) They don’t believe the world is flat.

3) They believe the moon controls the oceans tides.

4) They refer to Duck Dynasty as Dick Dynasty.

5) They don’t believe the Pope is the Anti – Christ.

6) They believe Glen Beck is a cry baby.

7) They don’t believe Obama went to Mars in his youth.

8) They believe that man created God.

9) They believe in alien life.

10) They believe Caitlyn Jenner is now a liberal.

If any of your friends believe any of the above , they are Godless communist liberals , and in urgent need of mental therapy.

Posted in John Hawkins, satire

One Hundred Ways To Spot A Communist Liberal – Part 7

Aviary Photo_1310842801347203611) They believe George Bush lied about weapons of Mass destruction in Iraq.

2) They don’t believe guns make Americans safer.

3) They believe Ted Nugent is a draft dodging pants shitter.

4) They don’t believe Barack Obama is plotting to invade Texas through Jade Helm.

5) They don’t believe the End Times are upon us because of Barack Obama.

6) They don’t believe the Obama dogs , Sunny and Bo , are gay.

7) They don’t believe all the Dancing With The Stars dancers are gay.

8) They don’t believe Barack Obama is really a shape shifting alien lizard.

9) They don’t believe everything wrong in the world is Barack Obama’s fault.

10) They believe conservatives are obsessed with Barack Obama.

If you know anyone who adheres to any of the above , they are Godless communists liberals , and are in need of mental therapy.

Posted in Alex Jones, satire

Was Obama’s Momma A Space Alien?

Aviary Photo_131082672456426121

Not long after Barack Obama’s first election into the White House , the birther movement was born. Claims that he was a foreigner , born in Kenya and therefore not eligible for the presidency. They immediately demanded to see his birth certificate as proof of his citizenship , and when it was eventually produced , they insisted it was genuine , even though it was quickly proven to be a fake , a cheap photo shopped forgery. The most compelling case of forgery came from Alex Jones on his radio program , Info Wars.

Whether you believe in the birther claim or not , the question is now irrelevant. Now , according to Mr. Jones , there is more compelling evidence revealing the true origins of Barack Obama. On his radio program , yesterday , Mr. Jones made a startling claim :

“Ladies and gentleman , and fellow patriotic gun loving Americans , I have more compelling evidence that Barack Obama is not what he seems , that he is more than just a foreigner. I have hard evidence that suggests he may be an alien from another world! Yes , that’s right , ladies and gentlemen , and fellow patriotic gun loving Americans. Last week , I came into contact with an individual in the pentagon who wishes to remain anonymous. This individual told me that he knows someone who knows someone who knows someone who knows someone who knows someone who had an encounter with a dark-skinned alien in the Nevada desert , fifty – four years ago , who claimed to be Barack Obama’s mother. This woman had glowing evil eyes that were hypnotic to say the least , according to this someone who knew someone who knew someone who knew someone – did I get that right? – who had this eerie encounter. Also , according to this someone who knew someone who knew – oh crap! This is confusing – she said she was pregnant with Barack Obama. Yes , ladies and gentlemen and fellow patriotic gun loving Americans. You heard that right. She was pregnant with the most evil dictator  in the history of the world – worse than Hitler , worse than Mussolini , and worse than Pol Pot – the man who the Illuminati – those evil Rothschild’s , the Bilderbergs  , the trilateral commission , the world banks , maybe even the Muslim Brotherhood , and all those other secret commie groups who were involved – undoubtedly recruited to be the savior of the world , the communist world , that is. Because that’s what it will soon be , overrun with commies and pinkos , who will round up all of us patriotic gun loving Americans , and throw us all in Fema camps. I don’t know about you ladies and gentlemen and fellow patriotic gun loving Americans , but I think this is big news , perhaps the biggest news in these modern times.

“Well , there you have it , ladies and gentlemen , and fellow patriotic gun loving Americans. Proof that Barack Obama’s mother was not Ann Dunham , as the liberal communist media would have you believe , but an honest to God space alien. Please join me next week , right here on Info Wars , and hear the interview straight from the horse’s mouth. I promise you won’t be disappointed. Will the lame stream media pick up this story and run with it? Probably not , as we all know that the media is controlled by the leftist liberals and communists , not to mention the LGBT community , otherwise known as the gay Gestapo of America , and those evil atheist scum.

“After the interview , I will gather all the facts and begin working on a sequel to The Obama Deception. I already have a tentative title for the video. The Obama Deception Part Two : The Mask Comes Off Again : Barack Obama , Evil Overlord Invader From Planet Gork. I look forward to producing this informative video and getting it out to you ladies and gentlemen and fellow patriotic , gun loving Americans.”