Obama Shreds Constitution , Uses Shavings As A Salad Topping

As the democratic presidential debates are scheduled to begin this Fall ,  the Obama’s are looking forward to serving a  special dinner in honor of the candidates. It is a dinner that is held every four years at the White House. But this  dinner will be particularly special  , as the Obama’s will shred several copies of the constitution and use the shavings as a salad topping. The president has been accused of shredding the constitution multiple times during his presidency , but this will be the only occasion that this has literally been done.

As the Obama’s announced their plan to shred the constitution  in  a statement to the press , the reactions from their critics were , as usual , predictable.

Fox News interrupted its regular programming to run a twenty-four hour special  condemning the Obama’s. Guest commentators included Sarah Palin , Rush Limbaugh ,  and  many others.

“Who does Obama think he is?” Sarah Palin said indignantly. “For six years we have watched this tyrant demonstrate his hatred of freedom and liberty by shredding the constitution with his executive orders , his support of the LGBT gay Gestapo , persecuting Christians , his support of Muslim terrorists by sending them flowers and assorted goodies in drones , giving Al Qaeda terrorists jobs in the White House , and allowing them to teach their Godless Muslim religion in our public and private schools. And now this! Shredding the constitution to feed it to his communist liberal friends in a salad , for Pete sake! Isn’t Thousand Island dressing – or any number of dressings for that matter – good enough for them? What about Wyler’s seasoned salt? That’s what I prefer on my salad. Certainly not the constitution. What will they do with it next? Substitute it for sugar in Sasha and Malia’s cereal , for God sake? That’s a fine example to set for your kids. This is just one more example of how the Obama’s hate America and everything it stands for!”

Rush Limbaugh said ,”It knew this day was coming folks. I made this prediction just last month. I predicted that the Obama administration was coming for our freedom and our guns. And I was right. This is it! This so-called dinner party is just the beginning of the end. The Obama Youth Brigade will be called out , along with his other army , the Black Panther Youth Of America Thugs , and the pillaging , the rioting and the race war will begin.”

Glen Beck lamenting the demise of America for the umpteenth time on his radio show.

Glen Beck gave an impassioned speech on his radio show , moving not only himself to tears , but his co-hosts , Pat and Stu , and his entire audience of listeners. Many of them called in to cry along with him.

“I’m sorry for the tears , ladies and gentlemen , and patriotic gun loving Americans ,” he said , pausing to blow his nose. “I normally don’t cry at all. But today is a special occasion for tears. I just love my country so much that it breaks my heart to see it destroyed on a daily basis by this socialist Marxist communist , Nazi , gay Muslim administration.

“Very soon , life as we know it will cease to exist. We are living in the last days as foretold in the book of Revelations. The Anti-Christ , Barack Obama , and his satanic minions plan to  shred the constitution of the United States , serve it in a salad to  the evil liberal democrats  , declare martial law , take our guns away , and throw us all into Fema camps. Never mind that I once said I could find no evidence for their existence. That doesn’t really matter right now.

“Are you afraid , ladies and gentlemen , and patriotic gun loving Americans? If you’re not , well , you should be. If you think this is a joke , well , it’s not. The America that you and I love with all of our God-fearing hearts , will be taken away from us , and the communist liberal , socialist , Nazi , gay Muslim take over of the United States – that you and I have feared all of our lives , that the John Birch Society has tirelessly warned us of – will finally come to pass. There is no hope for the future , ladies and gentlemen. Please join me in a moment of silence , as we remember America as it once was.”

In a response to the media back lash over the announcement to shred copies of the constitution and use the shavings as a salad topping , Michelle Obama declared that it had been nothing more than a hoax to get a reaction from their conservative critics ,  and like a hungry fish , the lame stream media eagerly took the bait.


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